Squabble
by I'm Not Wearing Any Pants
Summary: Grossly exaggerated character flaws do not an entertaining story make.


Ben 10 belongs to MoA.

It started to look like an approaching storm over Bellwood. For reasons unknown, the creepy stage hypnosis master midget, Sublimino, had chosen to wander aimlessly at that particular moment.

"Where the hell am I?" he wondered aloud. "And how did I get here?" He scratched his balding head, which his stupid comb over hid none of. "And what am I doing?" He could reach none of these existential answers, so he shrugged and defaulted to wanting to kill Ben Tennyson. He felt the sudden splash of rain drops. "But first, I'll run up to a random person's door and get out of this rain!"

He knocked on the first door and waited impatiently. After a long time, it opened.

"Who dares?" It was none other than Doctor Animo.

"I dare!" shouted Sublimino in a really loud voice.

"Don't I know you from that time we teamed up to fight Ben Tennyson?" Doctor Animo inquired suspiciously.

"Yeah. That was a pretty stupid episode. I got stuck with those ugly goth circus freaks," responded Sublimino. "Like they had any reason to make fun of me when they looked like that." He started to push his way past Doctor Animo. "Okay, now let me in, I'm going to stay with you in your house for a few hours or maybe a week, because."

"What! Hey, wait! I don't think do, little man!" Doctor Animo grabbed him and tried to hold him back.

"But I'm small and cute and obnoxious!" Sublimino whined. "Besides, you have to let the plot move forward!"

"The fuck I do," Doctor Animo snarled.

"But I'm scared of the thunder," Sublimino whined.

"Like I care," responded Doctor Animo. "I possess no concept of empathy, unlike some desperate dunderheads attempt to mischaracterize me as having for the sake of their ~feelz."

"I have a pocketful of marijuana," Sublimino said.

"Well get in here, friend," said Doctor Animo. He grabbed the tiny man-thing and lead him inside before the ran got him all wet.

When he got inside, Sublimino attempted to walk. He ended up tripping on his coat tails. Because that happened once, so running with it repeatedly makes it so much funnier.

"Ow, my face," he said on the floor.

"Why are you dressed like a retarded combination marching band slash circus ring leader?" Doctor Animo questioned as his guest picked himself back up.

"Why are you dressed like a pedophile?" Sublimino retorted.

"Touche," said Doctor Animo.

"This place smells like a zoo," Sublimino complained while he waved his little hand in front of his disproportionately large head.

"That's your problem. I'm used to it," Doctor Animo said to him. "Where's the hooch? And you better not have lied about having it, or I'll make you wish you'd never come in here by feeding you to my mutant snakes."

"Here!" Sublimino took the bag of weed from his pocket and threw it at the Doctor's feet. "Jesus, you are creepier than me."

"Thank you," Doctor Animo said, smirking.

"I'm extremely parched from all my loud talking. Can I have a drink?" Sublimino asked him.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because. I'm not a good host."

"But I'm really thirsty and I relinquished my entire Mary Jane stash to you! Come on."

"Go back outside and open your mouth if you need a drink so badly," said Doctor Animo dismissively.

Sublimino slipped on his coat and fell again. "Ow, damn it. It's not funny. I'm not this clumsy. I simply have poor fashion sense."

"It's funny to me," responded Doctor Animo. He put the bag on his kitchen table and took out a box from beneath it. Inside were blunt rolls. He began rolling up some fine doobies. "What were you doing wandering around here in the rain, anyway?"

"I don't know. I was maybe gonna kill Ben Tennyson," responded Sublimino.

"I can get behind that. I hate that kid," said Doctor Animo.

"So, you propose a team up?" Sublimino asked him.

"Yeah, I guess so. But it probably won't last long based on both our personalities and obvious mental issues," he said.

"Yeah. But it might be funny for a while," said Sublimino back to him. "And we could maybe kill Ben Tennyson with our combined skills."

"Yeah, that's true." Doctor Animo nodded. "Okay, let's do it.

(15 minutes later)

Ben was sitting on his ass, playing Sumo Slammers 25 All Star Battle Frontier X, as typical when he liked to relax when the world didn't need saving. Which was very rarely.

"All right, I am so good at this game," he gloated.

"Ben, you have to take out the garbage," his mom called up to him.

"Aw, mom!" Ben reached for the Omnitrix. If he could change into XLR8 he could maybe take the garbage out fast enough before the controller hit the floor. "I got this," he said.

He activated the Omnitrix and ended up as Cannonbolt.

"God fucking damn it," he said grumpily.

He heard a noise outside and shuffled to the window. He saw his dad with a chainsaw in the garage.

"What is dad going with that, I wonder?" he said. He shrugged it off. "But now how am I gonna get around? I'm too big to move without smashing a hole in the wall."

"Oh, Ben!" his mother called sweetly. Ben gasped when he saw her at his door. She'd seen his alien transformation.

"Mom, it's not what you think!" he tried to explain, until he noticed her weird expression. And that she had a large kitchen knife in her hand.

"Die, Ben!" she screamed, and ran at him.

"WTF, I'll take out the garbage, I swear!" he yelled. The knife just bounced off his armor. "Mom, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"Hey, Ben!" That was his father this time. The sound of a chainsaw in the house was enough to make even Ben's dumb ass realize something wasn't quite right. He came into the room and raised the chainsaw. "Die, Ben, die!"

"Well, fuck this," Ben said, before slamming out through the wall and rolling onto the front yard grass. He wasn't all that shocked to see a mutated rabbit with Doctor Animo riding on top of it. Sublimino, the hypnosis weirdo minor character from two episodes was also there, explaining the odd behavior of his parents. They had been hypnotized by his special pocket watch. "Why are you two working together? Didn't you learn anything from the Negative 10 episode?"

"Die, Ben Tennyson," they both shouted before attacking him.

Ben used his Cannonbolt powers of roll-smashing everything into a pulp to beat up Doctor Animo's mutated rabbit and then the Omnitrix timed out. He kicked Sublimino in the balls and grabbed the watch. He used it to hypnotize Doctor Animo into shitting his pants.

"Aaaah!" Doctor Animo yelled before collapsing to the ground.

"I saved the day again," said Ben proudly. "When are you losers gonna learn not to mess with Ben Tennyson?" He hoped never, because it was too damn fun kicking their asses and humiliating them.

Later on, Doctor Animo and Sublimino got to be each other's company again when they were both locked in the same jail cell together.

"God damn it, I hate you so much," said Doctor Animo to Sublimino.

"The feeling is mutual," he responded angrily.

After a few minutes they decided to have gay sex anyway. Because shipping.

(The Enddddddd)


End file.
